It's not like there's a 'find yourself' kit or road signs that say 'This way to being your own person.' If you're lucky, maybe there's someone who can help you, like a fat lady on the beach might yell 'Keep going! You can do it!' if you're a lousy swimmer and in way over your head. The funny thing is, that person is never who you think it's going to be. It's never who you want it to be.